Last summer I made a commitment to run 350 miles. I had finished a bad track season and all those miles would make me a better runner for cross country the next fall. I was determined to be the best cross country runner Park had.

My competitiveness convinced me to run just a little bit faster every mile in practice so it would pay off in the races.

Before the first cross country race, I thought I was going to dominate the rest of the competition. And then, a teammate appeared at my side. The second I saw her out of the corner of my eye, even though I still won the race, I felt defeated. My competitive spirit was crushed.  After that race, I had a hard time going to practice every day. It felt like a chore.

I enjoyed the social aspects of practice, but running was consistently the worst part of each day. At practice I had to be in front, and the second someone stepped in front of me, it reminded me of that race and how I had a hard time overcoming my feelings of defeat and frustration.

I began reevaluating my personal and athletic goals, which led me to wonder if I was good enough in all aspects of my life.

After a few weeks of reflection on my season, I realized winning was not everything and I could not let it consume my life. I am the most competitive person on the cross country team, but competition does not rule my existence. My defeat pushes me to be a better runner and teammate.

When I go home after I have a bad workout, I go for another run. I don’t sit on the couch; I do something to change what happened during the day.

In the past, a bad workout would have consumed my night, making me feel bad about myself.  Now, I know I am stepping in the right direction.

I am working hard in all parts of my life. Now, if someone beats me on a run, or gets a better score than me on a test, I do not feel defeated. I know I always try my best, and if my best is not perfect it is all right.

Striving to be the best is great, but when other aspects of your life begin to suffer, take a step back and reevaluate your priorities. Being the best should not define who you are but push you to be better.