Promposals prompt superficial affection

Elaborate prom invites are no longer genuine or intimate


Anna Williams

It is finally prom season, and high school students are, once again, deciding their plans for the memorable night. As the dance creeps closer, people are rushing to find their dates and ways to ask them. All over my social media, I see the excitement and enthusiasm. I am addicted to watching as people announce and showcase their dresses, suits, plans and the most popular promposals.

It seems as though each time I look on social media, I am bombarded with people asking their friends or significant others the big question: Prom? It is entertaining to see peoples’ reactions to whatever means they have been asked, whether that be of simplicity or extravagance. With each post, I find myself more excited to one day be asked to prom.

My favorite thing to see is people involving their friends by creating flash mobs with singing and dancing, but I also love the small notes slipped into peoples’ lockers. It is fun to see the creativity and thought that goes in each one. However, in watching and witnessing promposals, I find myself wondering if people are losing touch with what asking someone to a dance should be all about. Though I like the sentiment, I feel as if people can be inclined to go way too overboard.

Promposals should not have to be a charade or a display to show others, as buying an expensive gift or having a grand, public stunt will not make someone say “yes” more than they already would have. The intentions and feelings of someone should count more than the money they could spend on their promposal idea. I know that if I were to be asked through a great ordeal, I would feel awkward and guilty that the person had spent so much of their time and money just asking me to a high school dance.

I absolutely hate seeing people buy expensive jewelry or create baskets filled with gifts worth hundreds of dollars because saying “yes” to the promposal seems incentivised. Though having friends get together to make signs and create dance routines is fun, it is less intimate and personal. A promposal can be genuine and thoughtful without being expensive or attracting other peoples’ attention.

Even if those kinds of promposals are done with the best of intentions and include things that the person being asked is interested in, it focuses the excitement on the way in which they are being asked and not going to the dance with the person who asked them. People should be flattered by the affection shown — not by the expense or attention. One’s reaction to the person asking should be greater and more important than the reaction to the promposal itself. Nevertheless, it should be fun and meaningful.

When I was younger, I wanted a promposal like the ones in the movies. I remember replaying the scene in “10 Things I Hate About You” over and over again. I too wanted the school band to play “Can’t Take My Eyes off You” and my date to dance around the bleachers with a microphone. However, now that I am older and in high school, I realize how meaningful the little things can be. Showing your appreciation and affection for another should not have to be proven in an expected and grand gesture. What is most meaningful is fun and memorable.